Highly insecure people are among the most difficult personality types to deal with, says psychology expert Stefan Falk, who has spent 30 years coaching team members and CEOs. He shares the phrases insecure people always use — and how to respond.
Stefan Falk is a leadership consultant who studies workplace psychology and has spent over 30 years helping thousands of people navigate difficult relationships. He found that one of the most difficult personality types to deal with is highly insecure people. They are people who find comfort in stable and predictable environments. They prefer security and hate change. Yet change is a necessity for success. Unfortunately, he has seen many teams and organizations fail because of one highly insecure person standing in the way. The first step in preventing things from getting worse is knowing how to identify them.
Are you managing a highly insecure person? Here are seven things highly insecure people say when they feel change is coming:
The most important thing you can do is develop a sense of compassion for your insecure colleagues. Having dark, negative thoughts about them will get you nowhere. Find a balance between being supportive and exercising benevolent toughness. Maintain a sense of positivity and serenity, but don’t show you feel sorry for them. Insecure people often react without a deeper thought or understanding of what they are reacting to.
If they only get a comforting response from you, it could lead them to believe that they are right to be afraid or to be reactive, without questioning why. And don’t accept excuses. This will only make it easier for them to maintain their habits. Instead, follow this mantra: “An excuse is a claim, and a claim must be proven to be true.”
Ask questions to uncover their argument, and lead them to identify what is really true at that moment. This method can help them understand that their excuses can get in the way of what they can accomplish if they face their fears.
